Just Trying To Clear My Head...

Does anyone else feel like when their house isn't in order than life just isn't in order? I feel like I am drowning in paperwork, and stuff...junk really, that is taking over my life. I have this constant need to throw things away, and it is never enough. I walk around all day and try to find more stuff that I can get rid of, but the piles of stuff just don't go away....*sigh*. I feel like along with my house being filled with stuff so is my head. I can't seem to relax. I am constantly thinking about things, but I never get any where with my thoughts...they are a jumbled up mess. They are such a mess I am sure that this post isn't making any sense, but it feels good to at least write it down.

Justin and I are tiring to figure out a lot about our future and where we need to be, and what is best for our family. Life just seems so crazy sometimes. I was talking to a friend the other day, and I told her that things and plans change daily around here. I thought we had a plan, and I thought we had things somewhat figured out, and then we got a call...a call from the temple presidency...they wanted to meet with Justin. Yes, he got called as a temple worker. Not just a once a month temple worker, but an every week temple worker. We both really struggled with this, I mean come on, he is already the Elders Quorum president, and is constantly busy not only with that, but with work, and the million of other things he does. Justin met with them 4 weeks ago. After his meeting he called me and was clearly emotional about the whole thing. I wished that I had been there to witness everything. He told me what they said, and we both just sat there and cried. It was very emotional for both of us. I spent the rest of the day crying. Sometimes I have felt alone, and that my Heavenly Father in unaware of me, and the things in my life. I was clearly humbled that day as Justin told me what was said in his blessing. It was a wonderful blessing that was truly inspired. There was a part in there that is specific to a situation that is going on right now, no one could have known about...I didn't even know until in was mentioned in the blessing. My heavenly father is very aware of me, and my family, and I learned that day in a very humbling way. We feel very strongly that working in the Temple is going to be a great blessing to our family, and we need to be willing and able to do this. Since living here we have made it a priority to go EVERY month, and with the exception of a couple of months we have gone. I LOVE it, and I find so much joy in going and doing temple work. We need to be here, and we need to serve, but there are still aspects of our life that we don't understand. We are so unsure of so many things right now. I like things to be constant...I like schedules, and things planned, I like routines, and right now that is not how it is. I know that there are lessons in everything, and I hope that we are learning ours, and in the end we will be better for it. And in the mean time it wouldn't hurt if I could get my house decluttered, and organized a little too!:)